Moms.

Even when you're nervous to get help, mom's really come through.

My mom came into town this weekend and was awesome. She helped me with the guest list, gave me advice, looked at STUFF with me, let me talk, and hashed out ideas.

And Bernhardt's mom has been calling and sending us sweet packages...I think she does something for us every day. Amazing.

How lucky we are to have these ladies in our lives!

Marcia and Stacy.


Vicky and Bernhardt.


Moms talk.

Cool registry help.

Today I went to theknot.com and did a quick run-through of the things we MIGHT need. It's been odd, thinking about registering...we have all the kitchen things we need...

but then I went through this list and realized that we might need some new sheets...

I think I'm going to clean out our crappy stuff, have a garage sale, and register for some things...but nothing too outlandish. I'm kind of sick of having a house of JUNK. Time to minimize and modernize?

It's GO time.

So.
We changed everything.
We changed the budge to a reasonable $5000.
We changed the state where we're getting hitched to SC.
We changed the colors a million times.
We got a florist.
We reconsidered invitations.
And now...we're working on our wedding website and reading articles about strange registries in order to get out the invitations for an event that went from 300 guests to 85.

Wow.

The list has been the hardest thing to do...but my Mema gave me great advice. She said, "Stacy - you make your list and you invite the people you want...just do what you need to do and it will all be alright".

Wow.

Even when it's hard for other people to understand your angle on planning and inviting...it's nice to know that my Mema is there supporting my ideas and dreams. And yesterday when I spoke with my mom and she said she'd drive into town to help me with invitations...it made me feel so happy! I think I've been defensive about getting everything done in a smart way ALONE that I've neglected the good "togetherness" stuff a wedding can bring!

This wedding stuff is actually pretty awesome.

Going to weddings...

Wedding season is upon us.
I've been to two in the last two weekends...both beautiful and special in their own ways...both inspiring.


1) I was a date to a wedding and I hardly knew the bride, but man, was it amazing.
It was in the bride's backyard - her mother made her dress, and mutual friends acted as the band and the wedding photographer. She and her husband had one attendant each (a sister and a brother), who both wore what they wanted. The food was made by family and was amazing. The gift they sent us home with was a box of homemade truffles.

It made me feel so good to be there...a dance floor set up in the grass of a sweet backyard and the talents of friends as the gift.


2) My dear friend Jessica was married this past Saturday at The Thomas Bennett House in Charleston, SC.
It was a lavish affair - a tent, a DJ, friends and nice scotch everywhere...they even got a photo booth [the photo booth ROCKED - I hope we can have one even if it is a splurge...it was the BEST]. Jessica was beautiful walking down the isle with her father...and her husband Brent was beaming with a smile...
I read in their service - I was really nervous - but it all went ok.

Weddings.
Being involved in so much celebration was amazing, stressful, and eye-opening all at once. It made me realize what I want in a wedding...and it made me understand that everything I was piling on my wedding list in the beginning and everything I stripped away when I got stressed...well...it made me realize I don't have to get so uptight and anxious about a wedding! No matter what happens or where it is or what people eat...the reason for coming together is awesome. Family caterer or professional caterer...every bit of the ceremony and the party afterwards is about being with friends and family and loving each other.

After talking about weddings on Sunday, Bern and I have decided to go forth with a very small ceremony and a couple of casual receptions...it makes us both happy. More on that to come!

Smaller...more creative...better...

Bern and I are trying to come up with small, cheap, creative Midwestern places that would make a nice spot for a wedding and reception. If you have any ideas, send them my way!

* 2 years on Charleston, although life is feeling much more comfortable and settled.

taking back the money...

I am calling the Conservatory this week to get back our deposit.
It makes me sad, but it's just not the place for us. We can't afford the wedding we want...so...
we've decided to wait.

I'm pretty bummed with the move to Charleston. I miss the midwest more than I ever anticipated. Will I ever be satisfied?

The one amazing thing that happened with the move was my relationship with Bernhardt is even CLOSER than I ever imagined it could get - I realized that all I ever need is him. I've been so depressed with all the change - he's the one that keeps me going. We're going to be patient with life and figure out the wedding location slowly. We've planned on getting through this year and seeing where we really want to be - if our careers take us anywhere - if we feel right with SC. I'm in half a mind to pick up in a year and move somewhere else. You can't cram a wedding with my fickle moving whims.

Ch-ch-ch-ch-CHANGES?

A number of things have happened since I last wrote.

A big thing is that we found a catering company willing to work within our budget. "Food for Thought", a catering company in the city, has been the one place that has worked with our budget. Using plastic cutlery, putting seating up for only 50 guests, and allowing us the option of supplying our own alcohol has taken catering prices to something manageable.

BUT.

Bern and I are having different ideas...thinking of doing...something different. We know we only have around three months to figure this out. Any changes in location means getting deposits back and letting our band and vendors know. Right now, we still have time to dream and scheme and change things up. We don't have to get locked in tradition or buried in debt for a five hour party, which is what I think has been happening. For what we may spend on our wedding [and granted, it's less money than most people we know getting married, but still] we could take four amazing vacations or save to put down on a house or buy one season of clothing at Anthropologie:). Probably option two...hmmmmm.

My mind has gone back and forth this whole time of planning. I think we were so excited to be getting married in the beginning that we were jumping on each and every ship that happened by. Now that things have marinated, I feel back to square one, but in a good way. I look at my friends Claire and Greg, who were going the expensive Chicago route in the beginning and then had an amazing small ceremony on Cape Cod, as inspiration for what a wedding is really about. Check their first dance - I promise you'll cry with tears of delight.